2nd feb symptoms and conditions

DO NOT TAKE DOXYCYCLINE IF YOU HAVE ANY HISTORY OF DEPRESSION!!!

I do and doxy has sent me over the edge for about a month AFTER i stopped taking it.

I was given doxy by my doctor for a sinus infection for a week and stopped taking it just under a month ago. This past month has been absolute hell for me.

The day I stopped taking it I went from feeling fine into a 5 hour crying fit with suicidal thoughts in less than 30 minutes. During the fit I became convinced that this was how my life always is, that I was depressed, that I had always been depressed and that I needed anti depressant as I spend all my time crying. That was on 2nd Feb.

The next day I was shaky and felt very up and downy but went back to feeling normal pretty quickly and after I did some internet research on Doxycycline (the only change in my diet/lifestyle) assumed it was that. I read some pretty bad stuff on the internet about other people’s experiences which were very similar to the one I had had and I thought that must be it.

So I decided to drink lots of water and have been taking Milk Thistle to cleanse my liver.

Then this Saturday past I had exactly the same thing. I had another one of these 5 hour crying fits and more suicidal thoughts and I became convinced I was bipolar. This time was much worse in a lot of ways.

I felt it again felt like a panic attack and to me the change in my physiology was really noticeable. The noticeable dip in my mood – very sudden from feeling fine to feeling a little bit irritable and then withdrawn with some anxiety – and wanting to be reassured but also being a little aggressive in communication almost like trying to find a fight, then a change in breathing and heart rate and then plunge into dark thoughts and sobbing.

When I went to see the doctor on Monday my mood was still swinging up and down and I just felt crazy so I mentioend to him the doxy and he dismissed this without even asking a question about when or how much I'd taken.

I ask to be referred to a psychiatrist as I do get that I may have underlying issues and these mood swings were so bad and so strong and so by the time Wednesday came with my in and out moods I had convinced myself it was probably to do with my childhood and the difficult heart stuff and repressing how I really feel

Whilst I do have my fair share of childhood stuff and issues of the heart I think I’ve become so self aware and so careful with myself and I think I talk to my inner child so much and check that I am okay with things and I deal with things really well. so this has all come as a bit of nasty shock as I thought I was okay with everything. In fact I know I’m okay with everything as I write this.

But during these mood swings I am definitely not okay. I do not feel like myself. I become convinced that I have been lying to myself about being okay, that I have never been okay that I am mentally ill and that is why I am having mood swings and I start really analyzing everything and linking everything back to the past and trying to make links with things that are happening today and things that happened in the past. I haven’t had any change in my heart situation that this could be a reaction to, its remained the same for a number of months and I don’t have a problem with it but when I have this mood swing I blame that situation and my childhood together. I start wanting to blame people. I start thinking I have two personalities and I just start trying to find reasons and I have no idea what I feel, who I am or what I want, if I’m telling the truth of if I’ve ever told the truth. I start doubting everything and everyone. My head hurts, I get in a state of confusion and I become a little mean to people. I start trying to blame events and situations, anything I can find. It’s an absolute nightmare. Then I get confused about what I have and haven’t said and agitated that I need to say more to make myself understood. I might be stable for hours or even a day but it happens very suddenly and it’s a really physical sensation, first the dip in mood, the irritability, the breathing will change, I will feel anxious and can really feel my heart beating, like when you are really scared about something – that fight or flight feelings. I then get a really strong sense of insecurity and nervousness and will become really awkward at communication and almost aggressive and rude in my communications and then rueful.

The crazy thing is my mood is just absolutely all over the place in a way it has never ever been before, even in my days of deepest darkest moments when everything in life sucked and people were horrid to me. I don’t understand why I would, after all my years of learning how to deal with this and cope with this be even worse when my situation is so much better. It just doesn’t feel like its actually real. I don’t feel like anything I’ve said when I’ve been in these moods is actually a true reflection of how I feel when I am out of the swing.

Then I come back to feeling more like a version of myself but not quite and then I swing again very quickly and go from very hyper and laughing to almost the polar opposite in a very short space of time.

This is the first time in a week that I’ve felt like I am completely normal again. Right now I feel very calm and grounded and rational like I have been feeling for a very long time and I feel very clear in my head that I am completely fine and this is a reaction to some chemicals in my body affecting my mood rather than a psychological issue.

I am fully prepared for another full scale attack of mood swings and totally losing the plot again though.

I am lucky in that I have a good friend who called a doctor friend of his in the US and the first thing the doctor friend said when asked about Doxycline was 'don't tell me, you know someone who's had anxiety attacks and suicidal reactions'. According to this doctor this is VERY common and very well documented. There should be no lasting effects or permanent damage and now the doxy is out of my system I should not be experiencing these moods swings.

HOWEVER - he thins that because I have a history of depression due to my childhood issues the doxy has basically destabilised me and driven me to the edge again.

I did some really lengthy research because I really feel like this is a brain chemistry issue rather than a psychology issue and knowing I've dealt with everything and I just don't get why these issues would re-arise. I'm going to go get some therapy no matter what but I just wanted to know the brain chemistry.

Obviously if my GP doesnt even recognise that doxy can have this affect there is going to be no interest in helping me figure this out so I will figure it out myself.

From what I can understand Doxy decreases some amino acids in the brain which is important as simply put, amino acids get converted into neurotransmitters which play a critical role in your brain. Neurotransmitters are the chemicals which help your brain cells 'talk' to each other. Low levels of certain neurotransmitters have been associated with depression and anxiety.

I feel like I am 'back' from the Doxy but to be honest, I have no idea what it has done to my brain and I doubt there has been that much research into it...if so why on earth would they prescribe a drug that does this to people?
Particularly people who have a history of depression.

I am going to try taking amino acids to see if that helps - it can't hurt.

If anyone else is going through the same thing please get in touch and let me know!
This site totally helped me!! Thank you everyone who has posted on it. It really makes a huge difference to know that there are other people out there going through the same thing. I have felt like I am absolutely crazy! Thank you so much :-)