Antipsychotic medicines symptoms and conditions

I have been on antipsychotic medicines for like 14 years now I have been on every one there is and im only 23. A couple of years ago I was put on zyprexa for my ptsd, the nightmares, and the phobias and it really work well but it made me gain so much weight that the doctor switched me to Seroquel and i was on that for years but the side effects were awful. I still gained weight and the nightmares were getting even worse. And after I would take them I couldnt swallow and my heart rate would go up to like 120 beats per minute just lying down. I kept telling my doctor that it made me feel so weird like I was having a heart attack but he said that the medicine didnt do that but the second I stopped taking it (which I decided on my own) my heart felt so much better. It seems like the medicines for these kinds of disorders have the worst side effects of any medications out there. What is horrible is without them I feel like I am losing my mind. So I have no idea what to do.