Initial need symptoms and conditions

This may sound a little strange ... I was prescribed Lamictal off label for OCD. A lot of my obsessive-compulsive behavior is related to an insatiable need for male attention, in addition to an overwhelming need to check and fix my apperances - what my doctor calls BDD (Body Dismorphic Disorder, which is closly related to OCD). I started taking 50 mg of Lamictal, and after several months, ended up at 250 mg. My behavior didn't really seem to change and I didn't feel any side effects ... well, for the most part. I have taken SO many different kinds of medications for depression, OCD and social anxiety, and they have ALL had some side effect or another than made it impossible for me to continue taking the drug, no matter what the upside was. Dizziness, nausea, blurry vision, sexual side effects, memory loss, headaches, etc. You name the side effect, I've experienced it, but NOT from Lamictal. The only side effect I had from Lamictal wasn't really a "normal" side effect. It was fitting to my situation and my initial need for the drug. After being on Lamictal for a while, I felt nothing different in myself - no aching, nausea, vision issues, or forgetfulness ... just an extremely weak libido. And, I'm not talking about the sexual side effects that normally come along with taking certain medications. Where you just completely lose you sex drive, and the idea of sex ends up being totally disgusting to you. I didn't lose my sex drive - I just lost all my flirty, provocative, sexy, cheeky behavior. I use to want to take sexy pictures of myself for my boyfriend and things like that, and it all completely went away. I don't know if Lamictal is supposed to have sexual side effects - I don't think it is - but this was my experience with it. I want to continue taking Lamictal because it does curb some of my behavior that normally ends up putting me in danger and getting me in trouble, but I truly feel like a huge part of me is dead inside. I feel that my sexuality is a big part of who I am, whether I like it or not, and I miss it. I'm probably going to stop taking the medication JUST b/c I miss that certain part of myself. I would, however, recommend Lamictal to anyone with OCD who wants to try and control certain obsessive behavior. It seems to do the trick