Mojo symptoms and conditions

I've been on Lamictal 200mg for a couple of months and let me tell you, I haven't had a f^@#!&g good night sleep since! I am a 33 y.o. male with Bipolar Disorder (hate that label) and I have a "slight" case of paranoia. The drug has allowed me to refrain from acting out on certain impulses, but not suicidal tendencies. OK... now I do have fully functioning parts (one in particular) which worked fine before this drug (you see where I'm going with this?). It SUCKS!!! Let's just say that there are certain things I'd rather not have happen prematurely (I am not laughing). I do happen to be great in that particular category, yet this strips me of any natural ability to fully indulge in such activities. Uuggghhhh... Give me my mojo back or just shoot me!

My thyroid troubles started in 1993. I am not sure how long before the discovery I had the problem. Mine started as a nodule on one side. I was immediately put on Synthroid and had to go see the Endo every 6 months for a biopsy. In 1995 I became pregnant. I had one more biopsy until after the birth of my daughter. The Endo told me he wanted to see me right away after she was born to do another biopsy. I had my suspisions, but didn't think anyhing until after she was born and went for my biopsy. Well, I had cancer. I went through the whole thyroidectomy, the 3 days isolation with radio-iodine, and every year to every few years after I had to go back and get the radio-iodine treatment, while not the high dose as the first time, it went with the complete body scan. In fact, I am due now, but don't have health insurance. My dose has been switched a lot, I have probably been on every dose from the lowest up to .200mcg, which has been the highest for myself.

Symptoms: pre-thyroid disease, I am 5'2. I was always 110-115 lbs, I was 22 yrs old and 120 lbs. when I married in 1993. I did notice gradual weight gain, probably because of my thyroid problems. I am sad to say that now I am around 180 lbs. I cannot seem to lose the weight unless I go on a total starvation diet. I managed to lose 10-15 lbs over the past summer, but unfortunately for me it has come back over the winter. I tried to stay as active as possible by going to stores and malls to walk around. I do for a fact notice that when my dosage for Synthroid goes higher, so does my weight gain. I was on .137mcg over the summer, and I think that was a good dose for me, that was through the regular dr. The Endo is the one who put me back up to .150mcg. My Endo told me the thyroid is a regenerative organ, so it CAN grow back. I guess they don't want that in case of cancer again, and I guess that is why he keeps me on higher doses.

I personally cannot stand it. I feel it is a horrible curse. I feel very robbed of my previous active life. I have been dealing with this now for 12 years not having a thyroid and being on this medication. I feel angry that I do not have the energy to do things with my 12 yr old and 3 yr old. I miss the way I was before having thyroid disease. I feel very sad when they come up to me asking to do certain things and they (nor anyone else I know for that fact) can understand that I just feel so whooped, and no energy. All I ever seem to want to do is take a nap. I have migraine headaches constantly, I am constantly tired. I cannot concentrate, I have some memory loss. My ex-husband, and my current husband too for that fact think I am just being lazy. Well, that is not so. There are moments when I do feel a burst of energy, but then, I have to use that burst to do the things I need to do around the house.

Pre thyroid disease I was always active, never tired, could do anything. After: TIRED, I was 24 in 1996 and felt like an old lady, dry skin, no matter how much lotion I put on. The tub is full of hair, while it doesn't come out in clumps and I still have thick hair, I have hair all over the place. Irritable, mood swings, happy to angry and the snap of a finger. I can have insomnia some nights, constipation, lots of the same stuff others have listed on this forum. Those side affects are the same no matter what dose I am on. And like I said the higher the dose for me, the more weight I pack on. It is instantanious. Over Christmas, and no, it wasn't from eating all the goodies, I gained a lot of the weight I had lost over summer back, and that was because a few weeks before, the Endo had put me on the .150 mcg.