Schizophrenic symptoms and conditions

I've been on Geodon for 3 years now. At first I was on 120mg per day and then I was so sick of being drowsy in the morning that I reduced my dosage to 80 mg a day. I'm really sad and frustrated because I told my doctor that I wanted to go off of it, because I don't think I have a mental illness and she refused to help me go off of it. Its a really hard drug to come off of. And it makes me so angry because she never warned me when I was first forced to go on it that going off of it would be so difficult. It makes me so angry and sad and even suicidal that other people think they know whats best for me. I had a beautiful religious experience with Jesus. I made the mistake of telling my family and doctor, and they labeled me as schizophrenic and forced me onto medication (Geodon). I think its so unfair and I have resentment that my family did this to me. Nobody believes me that I had this religious experience (I'm a Catholic) and they all think I'm crazy. Now I want to enter a religious order and become a nun. I tried to enter an order and they asked me if I take any medication. The religion teaches that its a sin to lie, so I told the truth and told them about the medication. Religious orders are strict about not admitting people with 'mental problems' so she refused to admit me. Now I want to go off of the medicine so that the next time a religious order asks me if I take medication I can say 'no' and therefore avoid the whole subject of mental illness. My advice to anyone who is starting this medicine is quit before you get addicted because going off it is next to impossible. I really resent my psychiatrist and I think she's a horrible person for forcing me on this drug. They wouldn't let me leave the mental hospital and told me they would make a court order and give me shots if I refused to take the medication. Looking back, what I should have done is just quit the medication right when I got out of the hospital because they couldn't have done anything about it. Sorry this is so long but this whole issue has caused so much friction and even hatred for me for my mom, who refuses to believe in my religious experience. I think she says she believes me to shut me up. But if she really believed me she wouldn't see the need for me to be on this medication. I'm planning on slowly weaning myself off of it, but based on what I've read I know its going to be almost impossible. I work so I need my sleep every night. I asked my doctor for Xanax and sleeping pills to help me with the withdrawal symptoms, and she refused to give them to me. I'm afraid I'll overdose on sleeping pills just trying to get the sleep I need because going off Geodon causes awful excruciating insomnia. I buy the store brand sleeping pills because my doctor wont give them to me. My opinion is most mental illness can be solved with God and prayer to Jesus. Psychiatrists put everyone and their mother on medication and I think the ones I've had are awful, sadistic, uncaring, unfeeling, unloving, do more damage than good, godless, learned in the wrong kind of knowledge, wretched people. What I wanted here was advice or any tips to going off of Geodon. I kind of got off track. If anyone has gone off of it successfully, lend me your advice.

IF YOU ARE TAKING THIS, STOP NOW. There is hope!! I think after about 3 months it started effecting my activity. I started wanting to do so much but would just brush everything aside and not finish poems, art projects, not do things with people I really wanted to. but my acne went away.......and for a while that made me feel more confident. In late July I started having some mild halluicinations. things would just......seem different, I cannot explain it. In September I completely lost it. I heard and saw things that were not there, I did not know what was going on. but I pressed on with school. I thought I was schizophrenic......I was so scared. but I pressed on, until one night I went completely numb. I felt disassociated. I looked in the mirror just to make sure I was there. I had horrible graphic images come into my head. it was horrifying. I almost took my life one night because I thought there was no hope. I thought if this is my waking life forever, then I do not want to life. but I called the suicidal hotline and then went to my friends' place then the next day we drove 2 hours back home and talked to my gynecologist, and she immediately admitted me to the psych ward. I begged not to go, but it was for the best. I stayed there for 5 nights and it changed my life. I learned a lot of about faith and different walks of life that night. I have chosen to pursue Buddhist philosophies and eastern teachings while learning about more religions. I believe that God is just thought of differently in different countries, and it is not a mission to convert but just help. do what you can. I know many of you are not able as this poison of a pill has shaken you, but I promise you will get better. I honestly was going out of my mind for a few weeks, and I wanted to die one night. Now, each day is a step closer to healing and a step further from that shit. Once you stop taking it you should notice a difference. Seek some therapy or help though, as you may need it. You will learn who your true friends are during all of this, and probably learn a lot about yourself. It was so painful, and I'm still a little shaken by it, but my just being able to type this shows my gained coherence. So just know there is hope! I hope a class action lawsuit gets started and that it gets recalled soon also! Something I have started doing is bouncing a bouncy ball when I feel nervous, scared, paranoid etc. I find it fun and also takes your mind off and also is a much healthier way of relieving stress instead of squeezing a ball! email me at****** if you ever want any encouragement or tips or just want to ask me any question. I check my email everyday.

Mental meds are destroying our bodys and minds.. I would reccomend to any one going on marijuana, smoked once or twice daily and tramadol/Ultram for spot relief of depression and anxiety. The marijuana WILL help you if you are bipolar or schizophrenic or just depressed. I have noticed that it can sometimes help or hurt anxiety which i have a big problem with.. I choose to just spot treat with tramadol or xanax.. both have potential for addiction but who the hell cares? there not going to leave you dead or dying like like seroquel and other like drugs.
Don't let your doctor kill you.. THE FDA IS NOT YOUR FRIEND...
It's time we all realize that and stop being there lab rats. You only get one body, one life.. do what ever you have to do to live it.. thats my 5 cents :)

To guest 14703,

When it comes to psychological and emotional matters, it is difficult to come up with one absolute answer. The steroid's psychological side-effects can take a toll on anyone at any time, any dose or any stage. The way people deal with the side-effects depends a great deal on a person's mental history, personality traits and inner strength.
For me, although I was taking a high dose of 100 mg a day for 3 months and so on for 6 months, I never became manic, schizophrenic or had suicidal thoughts. However, I did become a little depressed due to things I had no control over, like the abrupt weight-gain, the ugly triple chin, hunched-back, hair-loss, lack of sleep or concentration, aches in my muscles and stomach, lack of support or understanding from my partner (the list is endless!).
The physical as well as the emotional changes go together hand in hand. All I wanted to do was to get off the horrible drug and be drug free. One good thing out of this nightmare was that I learned to take better care of body, mind and soul.

Gypsi

My nephew took Ritalin for years and has now been diagnosed Schizophrenic! I believe it stems from the prolonged use of Ritalin! He is on so much medication now and it is so sad! If only he wasn't so young and could have told someone how it made him feel. He's only 17 now and was diagnosed Schizo @ 15! Ritalin is a schedule II narcotic just like Cocaine which means it is one of the most potent so why in gods name would you give it to a child who's brain has not even fully developed! If anyone suggests your child take Ritalin ignore them or believe me you'll have far more problems!