IF YOU ARE TAKING THIS, STOP NOW. There is hope!! I think after about 3 months it started effecting my activity. I started wanting to do so much but would just brush everything aside and not finish poems, art projects, not do things with people I really wanted to. but my acne went away.......and for a while that made me feel more confident. In late July I started having some mild halluicinations. things would just......seem different, I cannot explain it. In September I completely lost it. I heard and saw things that were not there, I did not know what was going on. but I pressed on with school. I thought I was schizophrenic......I was so scared. but I pressed on, until one night I went completely numb. I felt disassociated. I looked in the mirror just to make sure I was there. I had horrible graphic images come into my head. it was horrifying. I almost took my life one night because I thought there was no hope. I thought if this is my waking life forever, then I do not want to life. but I called the suicidal hotline and then went to my friends' place then the next day we drove 2 hours back home and talked to my gynecologist, and she immediately admitted me to the psych ward. I begged not to go, but it was for the best. I stayed there for 5 nights and it changed my life. I learned a lot of about faith and different walks of life that night. I have chosen to pursue Buddhist philosophies and eastern teachings while learning about more religions. I believe that God is just thought of differently in different countries, and it is not a mission to convert but just help. do what you can. I know many of you are not able as this poison of a pill has shaken you, but I promise you will get better. I honestly was going out of my mind for a few weeks, and I wanted to die one night. Now, each day is a step closer to healing and a step further from that shit. Once you stop taking it you should notice a difference. Seek some therapy or help though, as you may need it. You will learn who your true friends are during all of this, and probably learn a lot about yourself. It was so painful, and I'm still a little shaken by it, but my just being able to type this shows my gained coherence. So just know there is hope! I hope a class action lawsuit gets started and that it gets recalled soon also! Something I have started doing is bouncing a bouncy ball when I feel nervous, scared, paranoid etc. I find it fun and also takes your mind off and also is a much healthier way of relieving stress instead of squeezing a ball! email me at****** if you ever want any encouragement or tips or just want to ask me any question. I check my email everyday.
Yasmin RSS Feed