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I have been on prednisone for 11+ years due to having had a heart...

Posted at 3: 2 AM on May 08, 2009 by arthurx, #41303
I have been on prednisone for 11+ years due to having had a heart transplant. The prednisone keeps my heart from rejecting. I have not taken it for 2 days and I am in the process of passive suicide. I am driving out west into the desserts to sit and die. I can no longer be around people for I am afraid I may kill someone or at least significantly hurt them. I have been homicidal and suicidal for 11 years due to this med. I would enjoy killing everyone and everything. I hate myself and I want to die. Prednisone made me become "Evil"; Hell incarnated. I don't want to live in a mental institution and my doctor will only give me Seroquel thinking this will help me. I tell him it doesn't help me but he thinks it does. Stupid fucking doctor. My transplant docotrs won't even listen to me when I talk about "mental" issues. Everything pisses me off. It is raining outside and this makes me so mad and stressed. I have been in this psychotically angry and agitated state of mind for 11 years. I have punched myself many times in the head and banged my head against walls trying to get homicidal and suicidal thoughts out of my mind to no avail. I would like to try ECT (electro-convulsive-therapy) but I won't even mention this to my doctor because he will literally laugh at me and make me so god dam mad that I would enjoy killing him right then and there. I'm sick and tired of living in hell everyday. Do not take prednisone no matter what, unless your life depends on it. And then what type of life will you have? Maybe a life full of hate, rage, anger, homicidal and suicidal thougts even when you dream. Fuck life! Arthur X 1968-2009
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Reply 6 months ago on May 08, 2009 by ddeboer, #19610

E-mail me back and lets talk. I have been on it a very long time also.
Please e-mail me.

ds3175@comcast.net

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Reply 6 months ago on May 08, 2009 by 47140, #19623

There are lots of good doctors out there who will listen and help you.
I know alot about Prednisone. I will listen and help you and I'm no doc.

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Reply 6 months ago on May 08, 2009 by dima82, #19628

Hi, I've been on and off prednisone for more than 20 years. Did you ask your transplant team to change the prednisone for something else? You could take vitamins/minerals to offset its side effects, however, first you'll need to ask your Drs how it might affect your immune system, because high-quality vitamins/minerals tend to enhance the immune system, which in turn, the immune-suppressive drugs do suppress in order to save your new heart.

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Reply 6 months ago on May 09, 2009 by propsguy, #19647

prednisone ruined my mother's life! i'm on it now and i'm doing all kinds of things naturally to protect myself- rhizinate to protect my stomach lining, progesterone & exercise to protect my bones. massive doses of anti-inflammatory omega-3 oils. please try some other things.

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Reply 5 months ago on May 14, 2009 by cindy910, #19826

Arthur,

I have only been on Prednisone for a short time and can certainly feel the effects. I have great empathy for you - but you are not alone and I believe there are solutions. Please reach out to me, a friend, a family member or even a doctor. You are not alone.

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Reply 5 months ago on May 22, 2009 by owlathome, #20038

Dear Arthur,
I have been on Prednisone for a long time and although it's not been quite as bad as it has for you, I can understand.
Please, please, please call a suicide hot line and tell them what you said here. I'm sure they can find you a doctor that will LISTEN to you. God, I hate it when doctors won't listen. Please check back here and let us know how you are doing.

Sincerely,
owlathome
owlathome.jws@gmail.com

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Reply 3 months ago on Jul 15, 2009 by twigsonic, #21551

I'm so sorry this has happened to you. I hope you are still alive and have found some help for what you're going through. If you have any money i'd suggest a naturopathic doctor to wean you off the prednisone and onto something that will fix your adrenals because after taking prednisone that long your adrenals wont work anymore and you wont be able to handle ANY stress at all. Licorice extract is supposed to help with that, also they sell adrenal extract at the health food store.
I have heard that when someone has a transplant they take on interests and personality traits, maybe even memories of the person who's organ they recieved. Do you have any idea at all about who the person was you recieved the heart from? If you could find out all you can about him, and then as corny as it sounds, have a small funeral ceromony for him, it may help. Lastly I would go to a catholic church, even if your not catholic and tell them your story, do not hold back anything, but also dont act out of control enough for them to call the police or pschy.ward. Ask them about excorcism. If they laugh or dont take you seriously, calmy leave and go to another church. You could also email george noory at coasttocoastam.com and ask him how to contact one of his guests who may know about excorcism, he's had a few on his show. Lorraine warren of connecticut is an excorcist who may help you if you email or call her.
I don't know what's happening to you but I think trying some of these things could help you and it is better to try and fail than to die without giving it another shot. I hope you get this before then and i'm sorry you're in such turmoil.

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