A week ago I went to my first "psych appointment" in about two ye...

A week ago I went to my first "psych appointment" in about two years. He was a new doctor, so the "new questions" he asked me brought up some thoughts about my past...medically. Every time I tell a professional, where they're behind the clipboard & i'm in the chair, how much lamictal & abilify I was on, they look shocked & ask questions. Simply because everyone thinks it was TOO much for a manic depressive diagnosis. 200mgs of Lamictal & 30mgs of Abilify for about two years. I am a bright, young, witty girl...or well, I was. It's not that i'm technically old now, I'm merely twenty.. It's not that i'm dumb, I just can't piece all my jumbled thoughts together anymore.... Word vomit is getting old... "Brain Farts" are embarrassing... & I feel like I'M getting old.. Thinking of actually being sixty makes me want to cry, who knows how tired i'll feel then.. Reading these comments make me feel re-assured that it's not "just me"...but I feel like my brain is fried sometimes, ya know? Then 60 seconds later, I'm thinking clearly again... If it's because of all the medicine I was on, that has shocked so many doctors & therapists at the dose, I'm really glad I came out of that "phase" mentally *****.hah. Thanks you, to those who were in control when I was under the age of 18. Thanks a lot :)