I first started taking Lexapro 10 mg about 2 years ago. I felt li...

I first started taking Lexapro 10 mg about 2 years ago. I felt like it wasn't working for me anymore. I had sunk back into my deep depression and was having really bad social and non social anxiety. I went to the doctor and told him that I wanted to try Zoloft. He prescribed me Zoloft 50 mg. I have been on it for about 6 months. I noticed changes as soon as 2-3 weeks. I felt so good about myself and was not having any anxiety. And then it began... I noticed that as time went by I was dropping weight tremendously. I am 5'7 and at that time I weighed 150lbs. I completely lost my appetite and only ate once a day, if at all. I now weigh 120lbs. This is only the beginning... In October of '04 I started using drugs i.e. Lortab, Lorcet, Percocet, Klonopin, Xanax. I have never been the one to use such drugs to get "high" from. I want to say I was on a self-destruct mode. Im only 21 so my mom noticed that I was not acting myself, losing so much weight, being angry, irritable, ect. My mom came home from work early one day and saw I was still sleeping at 2pm. Which is not like me at ALL. She looked in my purse because she had that motherly instinct that I was on drugs. She found all my pills, and took me to a detox program. I didnt care that I was hurting my family, friends, let alone myself. I didnt care about anything but getting messed up. Needless to say Im am now drug-free but there is more... After I got clean from the pills, I started drinking...binge drinking. I only drank to get really drunk. Let me stress the word really in that last sentence. Once again, I was on self destruct mode. I did some research on Zoloft and I have found out that you can become self destructive/violent towards yourself when on this drug. I would like to consider that taking drugs and drinking to the extreme while knowing it could harm me/kill me would fall in the category of self destruction. Also, I have really bad tremors from time to time and I will go from having an "I dont care" attitude to "please love me" attitude. Some things are for some people. And this is not for me. I am now winging myself off of this crazy blue pill. I think Im ready to become myself again. I also think that for some people it is all a mental thing. I have realized this for myself. That by taking my medicine everyday I feel comforted. When Im having a bad beginning to a day, I take my meds and for the rest of the day I tell myself that Ill be ok, because I have taking my medicine. I dont know if anyone else feels this way... Hope this helps other people out if they are having some of these same reactions I am open to discuss. ******